I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas

It's that time of year again!! The decorations are out, the tree is up and being trimmed, and the baking ingredients anxiously await being used! It's my wee one's first Christmas, and though she will only be 10 months old, I still find myself tempted to go all out. Stacks of presents, oodles of cookies, cards to family and friends, and 10 different Christmas dresses shown off in a revolving fashion show.

Does she need Xmas pjs? Probably not. Do we need to take her to see Santa and pay 20 bucks for a picture she will probably be crying in? Ummm...no. But do I want all of this? Absolutely. I love Christmas, but I find that I put so much pressure on myself to make it a perfect holiday. My delicious husband does not enjoy the holiday at all, so really it's just for me that I go all out for. Now that there is a small one in the mix, its on like Donkey Kong!!

So stay tuned for pictures of my small one with Xmas pjs, hear about our new favorite Xmas books, and definitely wait and hear how the meet and greet with Santa went.

Happy Holidays!!

My baby is the best baby in the land!

I know, I know. Who wants to hear about another person's kid? Well, tough! My girl has hit many milestones in the last week and a half and I am just soooooo proud!! She is pulling herself up (which prompted mom and dad to drop her crib down), she is combat crawling like a Marine in boot camp, she is getting herself up to a sitting position, and she said her first word which in a week has gone from "gie" to "goggie" (aka doggie). She's getting to be such a big girl!! Brings a tear to my eye and a flutter to my heart.

I want what is best for my little punk, but our budget does not allow for toys made of gold and silver. So, fisher price is her friend. With the holidays approaching, its really hard not to go overboard. A tree will be a must, cookies - check, and presents for my delicious girl. I am also discovering all of the holiday clothes!!! Yikes!!! Hubby is getting a little nervous. How many Christmas outfits does an 8 month old need for pete's sake? My answer? 2 for each day!

I love my little bean!!!

Job Market? What Job Market?

As an unemployed teacher, I am allowed to be on unemployment benefits. This is a mixed blessing - it provides extra money that our family desperately needs, but it is also a dwindling supply and can never be counted on. This provides a relieving, yet frustrating situation in the Scott household. I recently came to the decision that teaching may be a few years down the road for me due to the current climate in California. So now what?

I thought maybe something from home, like medical transcribing. However, the unemployment office informed me that it was not a growing job market and they would not extend my benefits while I took the training. In a warbling, tear choked voice I asked "what is a growing job market in this great state of ours?" The woman helping me had no advice. No comfort. Just a pitying "sorry but you need to leave" kind of look on her face.

As I gave in to a couple days of shock, awe, and panic, I am slowly trying to wrap my mind around my situation. I realize that others are in this position and are in even more desperate times than my family, but I think this is one of those times that I selfishly say "But what about us!!!"

What do I do now? Do I start a new career? Something that doesn't require more schooling. I have a masters degree for pete's sake! And what does a bachelor's in history get you? Nothing.

So wish me luck oh world. I am taking my Aunt's advice. I am leaving it in God's hands. He has always taken care of us in the past. I need to calm down and listen for an answer instead of running around like a chicken with its head cut off (I love that saying!). Perhaps the zoo is hiring someone to walk around and pet the animals. Tigers need snuggling too don't they?

Faith or fun?

Recently I went to a meeting that is for mothers of preschoolers. Yes there is a name, and I'm sure you know what that group is really called; but for the purpose of this blog - it is just a meeting.

I was excited because I knew a few of the moms that attended these meetings, and they had childcare. For 2 exhilarating hours, I could be barnacle child free! So how bad could this be?

Bad! I was assigned to a table, which I knew would happen, but I was not prepared for the table I was told to sit at. The ladies were very kind, very welcoming, and well... that's all I can think of. We prayed a couple of times (the group is church based), we did an activity, and we had a guess speaker. At the end of two hours I was relieved to go. Why you may ask?

I think I was expecting a morning where we could talk about our kids - the good, the bad, and the ugly, our husbands - the good, the bad, and the ugly, or our thighs - the good, the bad, and the dimpled. I was hoping for some good girl chat!!! I'll give you a topic -patience - discuss amongst yourselves (oh how I miss Mike Myers on SNL). But no, not a lot of laughter, not any discussion of thighs. In fact it was kind of a downer.

My relationship with God has been a tenuous one in the past 20 years, but I am closer to Him than ever before now. I remind myself to be a better person much more now, I try to judge less and love more, and I pray as often as I can. But can't I have faith and still have fun??? This is the thought that occurred to me as I left the meeting. I enjoy laughter. It has gotten me through some tough times. Is it appropriate to make jokes that my dad's work truck gave him his cancer due to its high level of uncleanliness? Maybe. Was it inappropriate for my husband and I to laugh over a couple of silly jokes on the internet while our daughter was having surgery at 2 months old? Perhaps. But I have found that without laughter, the tough things in life are even tougher. Does God want us to be somber in our faith? I hope not! I think that by having a good time with family and friends, we share the joy and light that God brings to our hearts with those around us.

So lighten up girls. I believe God wants us to have a good time, laugh, and be merry. Pray with a light heart and an open one. Be thankful for the good in your life, and find some humor in the bad. Then thank God for giving you a sense of humor to deal with it all!

Intro to the Simple Life

I'm going to try to blog.

I can't guarantee my diligence on doing this everyday. Heck, it may end up being once a week. But we will see how it goes.

I am the mom of an 8 month old girl. This child of mine is heart achingly beautiful, smart, and a bit of a pistol. Yup, a pistol.

How can an 8 month old be a pistol already? I was asked this last night at bunco with an air of disbelief in the inquirer's tone. Well, here's your answer oh disbelieving one. My angel on earth, fruit of my loins, does not sleep, she is incredibly alert (has been since she popped out), and is what the lovely Dr. Sears calls High Needs. She will yell at you in annoyance, and then when she is absolutely sure she has your attention, will break into a smile that will light up any room.

The only problem is - no sleep. This child will get 6-8 hours of sleep at night and then nap a couple times during the day (an hour if I'm lucky), and just continue plugging along.

So, feeling my way into motherhood has been an amazing voyage - stressful, tiring, frustrating, infuriating, magical, amazing, joyful, blessed, and many more adjectives.

So what am I blogging about you may ask? Do not be scared oh reader, this will not be a daily diatribe about the challenges of motherhood (although, it will make up a good part of it of course). No this blog will be about me trying to figure out who I am.

Let's look at who I am right now:

• Laid off teacher who thoroughly enjoyed her career and was heartbroken when it ended.
• Married to an awesome man who drives me crazy with love and frustration. (sidenote: men are a different species anyone who says different has a. never lived with a man, or b. is a loon)
• Living the life of a military wife 'cause hubby is back in the service after a long break.
• Mother of aforesaid High Needs child.
• Homemaker who dreamed of being one, but is now questioning if I am cut out for such a life.

I will explore my new life and try to find out what interests me, what keeps me sane, and how I can get some sleep!!